how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
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