so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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