I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
