he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
That's intense
Your tits are I can't wait for
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
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