I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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