She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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