ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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