I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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