i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
He did a backflip because drugs
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
