when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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