What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Randomize
