she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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