There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
