Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
