Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
