im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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