The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I have fence marks all over my body
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
