I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
i will never coherently bang her
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
