You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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