just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize
