your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
