Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
