That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
