Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
