Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
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