Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize