she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
he puts the penis in happiness.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
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