Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Randomize
