yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize
