You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
