..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
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