how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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