come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
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