On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
