Sponge bath it is.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Randomize
