trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
