i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
