Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
