saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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