She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
