I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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