sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Come share oat with me in your robe
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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