I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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