just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Randomize
