Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
