That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
