Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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