Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
