Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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