Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
